Chapter 23

Xu Er felt rather stiff at this moment.

It wasn’t his body that was stiff, but his mind.

"Are these flowers for me?"

After another stretch of silence, it was Song Ruichi who broke the quiet again.

Xu Er grew even stiffer. The word "yes" simply couldn't make it past his lips. He clutched the bouquet tighter, with no intention of handing it over to Song Ruichi.

He was only able to recall yesterday’s events thanks to the dream he’d just had. The content of the dream didn't matter—he’d already forgotten it anyway—but the moment he woke up, those hazy memories from yesterday had suddenly slammed into his brain.

He had kissed Song Ruichi on the cheek.

He... had... kissed... Song Ruichi... on the... cheek?

What the hell? Why on earth did he go and kiss Song Ruichi? What was wrong with him? And now, to make matters worse, he was giving the man flowers?

Just then, another thought flashed into Xu Er’s mind: it was the question Song Ruichi had asked him a few hours ago: "Why are you giving me flowers?"

Good grief. As if not being able to answer that wasn't bad enough, he’d gone and bought another bunch.

"These flowers..." Xu Er started dryly, then continued, "Yesterday, I..." He didn't know how to go on, so he let out a couple of awkward laughs: "Haha."

Perhaps the laugh was too painful to listen to, because Song Ruichi just looked at him without saying a word.

Xu Er swallowed hard and slowly let his smile fade.

"It’s just," Xu Er didn't dare meet Song Ruichi’s eyes. He felt he needed to provide an explanation, so he said with great difficulty, "Please don't misunderstand."

He recalled what Xu Chen had told him—that after Song Ruichi found out a boy liked him, he stopped talking to him and even blocked him.

"Although I don't know why I did that," Xu Er rushed to explain, "you have to believe me, I’m not gay. I think of you as a friend."

Song Ruichi seemed to ponder this for a moment before asking, "What did you remember?"

Xu Er felt his scalp tingle with embarrassment. "I kissed you on the cheek last night." Seeing the expression on Song Ruichi’s face, he lost his nerve, then clung to a sliver of hope: "Did that actually happen?"

"Yes," Song Ruichi said.

Xu Er: "..."

Alright then.

"Haha," Xu Er repeated, "please don't misunderstand. I was just drunk; I didn't know what I was doing."

Song Ruichi shook his head. "I didn't misunderstand." He asked again, "Are these flowers for me?"

Xu Er let out an "uh," then said, "Yes."

Only then did he hand over the flowers. Of course, he added, "These are just a simple token of gratitude for making me dinner today."

"I know," Song Ruichi said as he took the flowers. "I didn't misunderstand."

Then, Song Ruichi added, "Thank you."

"You're welcome," Xu Er replied.

At this point, Xu Er’s mind was no longer occupied with whether the flowers were pretty or whether they were a good match for Song Ruichi, nor was he wondering if Song Ruichi would be happy to receive them. He only cared about whether Song Ruichi actually believed him.

Judging by his expression, he probably did.

Right?

He’d let him stay yesterday, and he was still following through with his plan to cook for him today. So, it seemed unlikely that Song Ruichi would start ignoring him from now on.

It seemed like everything was fine, right?

Xu Er couldn't help but purse his lips. He really couldn't have Song Ruichi ignoring him.

Song Ruichi went inside with the flowers, and Xu Er followed him in. Just like last time, the flowers were placed on the edge of the bar counter. There was a framed painting above the flowers; Xu Er had been here many times, but this was the first time he’d noticed its content. It was a distorted, dark sky. But looking at it now, it felt more like a withered sky. It matched his current mood quite well.

Song Ruichi went back to the kitchen, and Xu Er sat on the sofa, distracted.

He was wondering why he hadn't just said something when Song Ruichi first asked why he’d brought the flowers. Now look at the mess he’d made. But then he thought, maybe it was better that he hadn't said anything—if Song Ruichi knew he was only doing it to repay a favor, he’d definitely be angry.

Then, he thought that he’d been a bit too impulsive just now. What if he hadn't said anything? What if he’d just played dumb, pretending he didn't remember what happened yesterday? But that probably wouldn't have worked; he was the type to wear his heart on his sleeve. Besides, by speaking up, he could find out exactly where he stood from Song Ruichi’s own mouth, rather than hiding and waiting in an endless cycle of guessing. He couldn't bear the thought of Song Ruichi just going silent and cutting him off later.

Ah...

Suddenly, he felt so annoyed.

He remembered Chen Nan asking him last week if he had something on his mind. Well, now he really did.

To think, he used to be such a happy boy.

Since he’d thought of Chen Nan, Xu Er acted on impulse again and opened his WeChat.

This was how he started:

Xu Er: "I have a friend who got drunk and accidentally kissed his friend."

Xu Er sent that, not yet sure what to say next.

Chen Nan replied: "Hahahahahahahahahahahaha."

Xu Er asked, confused: "Is it that funny?"

Chen Nan didn't answer whether it was funny, but instead asked: "Who did you kiss?"

Xu Er’s hand trembled; his watch detected that his heart rate had reached 96.

Xu Er: "It wasn't me."

But he quickly retracted that message.

Xu Er: "Alright, it actually was me."

Chen Nan: "Hahahahahahahahaha."

Chen Nan: "You rascal."

Chen Nan: "Who did you kiss?"

Chen Nan: "It wouldn't be Song Ruichi, would it?"

Xu Er stopped struggling: "Yes."

Chen Nan: "Oh my god."

Chen Nan: "What was Song Ruichi’s reaction?"

Xu Er: "I don't remember. I just remember that I kissed him."

To prevent any misunderstanding and keep Chen Nan from blowing things out of proportion, Xu Er added: "I kissed his cheek."

Chen Nan: "And now?"

Chen Nan: "How is Song Ruichi acting?"

Xu Er thought about it: "He’s not acting any different."

Chen Nan: "Pfft, small problem."

Chen Nan: "People who are drunk can do anything."

Chen Nan: "Forget kissing a cheek, I had a colleague once who got drunk and kissed another colleague on the mouth. And they barely even spoke to each other normally."

Xu Er frowned at first, then felt a sense of relief, before frowning again. He hadn't expected the conversation to go in this direction.

Xu Er suddenly didn't know what to say.

Chen Nan added: "I think you shouldn't take it to heart. Just act natural, or it’ll be even more awkward."

Xu Er: "Okay."

Chen Nan: "Why are you drinking with him again?"

Chen Nan: "Didn't you get drunk last time?"

Xu Er: "It’s because I got drunk last time."

Xu Er: "I wanted to test my alcohol tolerance this time."

Chen Nan: "And so, what is your tolerance?"

Xu Er: "One 500ml bottle of beer."

Chen Nan: "Hahahahahahahahahahaha, you’re killing me."

Chen Nan: "Give up drinking!"

Xu Er: [Sweat]

Xu Er: "Definitely."

Chen Nan’s attitude of not treating it as a big deal was a genuine comfort to Xu Er. He thought that if Chen Nan could understand, then Song Ruichi should be able to as well. He would surely write it off as a small, drunken mistake on Xu Er’s part.

Over there, the aroma of fish soup drifted out from the kitchen, and even Soso walked over to squat by the kitchen door, watching.

It wasn't quite ready yet, so Song Ruichi turned down the heat and picked up his phone.

The group chat was lively.

Shi Ziyi: "Oh ho, oh ho."

Shi Ziyi: "Is it more flowers from Xu Er?"

Ying Jing: "Who else could it be?"

Ying Jing: "Have you ever seen him show off flowers from anyone else?"

Xu Hao: "Looking at the background, you're at home, Song Song."

Xu Hao: "Brought him home again?"

Xiao Xia: "Hey! I can testify, he brought him home!"

Xiao Xia: "I ran into them at the supermarket today. They were buying groceries and daily necessities. What does that mean, guys?"

Shi Ziyi: "Are they living together already?"

Ying Jing: "Living together already?"

Xu Hao: "Living together already?"

Xiao Xia: "Living together already?"

Chen Yu: "Living together already?"

Song Ruichi appeared: "We're married."

As soon as he posted that, the group exploded. Congratulations poured in, people mentioned they had their gift money ready, asked when the wedding would be, and all sorts of other nonsense.

Song Ruichi added: "Wait for the announcement."

Everyone responded with "Okay, okay, okay."

A while later, Shi Ziyi was genuinely curious: "Didn't you say he was a straight guy? Why does he keep giving you flowers!"

Ying Jing: "Exactly! Flirting with our Song Song like this!"

Chen Yu: "What does he take our Song Song for!"

Xu Hao: "Just because he’s a straight guy, does that mean he can bully people like this?"

Song Ruichi added: "Exactly."

Shi Ziyi: "Song Song, let's stop paying attention to him."

Ying Jing: "Stop hanging out with him."

Song Ruichi tapped the keyboard, but he hesitated for a moment and didn't type anything. Finally, he put his phone away and turned off the stove.

And what was Xu Er doing at this moment?

He was staring at the television, which wasn't even on, completely motionless. His gaze was unfocused, but in his mind, he was replaying the scene of kissing Song Ruichi over and over.

It was truly shocking.

His memory seemed to clear up a little more; he could recall leaning over the sofa to kiss Song Ruichi.

Leaning over the sofa.

Xu Er looked down and placed his hand on the edge of the sofa where it had been in his memory, pressing down on it. The moment he realized what he was doing, Xu Er jumped like a startled bird, his hand pulling away instantly.

What was he doing?

Xu Er forcefully demanded that he stop thinking about it and stood up, looking for something to do.

That was when he caught the scent of the food in the air.

Song Ruichi’s kitchen door was open, so Xu Er walked over and leaned against the doorframe, right next to Soso.

Soon, Song Ruichi caught sight of him in his peripheral vision.

"Almost done," Song Ruichi said.

Xu Er smiled. "It smells so good, Chef Song."

Song Ruichi: "Does that earn me extra points?"

Xu Er: "Yes!"

Xu Er hadn't been standing there long before Song Ruichi brought out the first dish. Xu Er was finally able to help; soon, they were carrying plates, setting the table, and serving rice. Once everything was ready, the two sat down facing each other.

Although the bags they had brought back from the supermarket had felt quite substantial, the table was now filled with everyday dishes in bowls and plates. It didn't feel like he was trying to show off the most elaborate, fancy dishes he could make; instead, it made Xu Er feel at ease.

For his first bite, he tried the braised pork in front of him.

He tasted it slowly, focusing on the flavors, chewing carefully. But even after he’d swallowed, Song Ruichi didn't say a word, just focused on ladling out the soup.

Xu Er laughed to himself. "Aren't you going to ask me?"

Only then did Song Ruichi ask: "Is it good?"